This is America, land of print so tiny and so confusing that you need to hire a lawyer to understand. This is America, a land where radio announcers speak so fast at the end of a spot, nobody can comprehend whatever it was they said. This is America, where television commercials place a disclaimer on the screen for a third of a second with print so dense that by time you see it, it's gone.

This is America, land of the free... Oh wait... Just a minute. Seems like while we were trying to make sense of that contract, our freedoms were sold to the highest bidder.

Never mind.

- Arye Michael Bender -